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Easing First-Day Fears


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Easing First-Day Fears
Back-to-grade school With Ease

First-day jitters--almost every child and parent has at least a few as fall approaches and it's time to go back to school. Here are some tips to help prepare for the first day of classes, whether your child is heading to school for the first time, starting a new school or returning to a familiar school.

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Talk to your child about what to expect at school. Tell her how enthusiastic you were about school, how proud you are of your student and what fun school will be. Your enthusiasm will rub off. By talking about what to expect at school, you can help dispel any fears about school matters, such as the amount of homework, how mean or hard certain teachers might be or the quality of the cafeteria food.
Clarify after-school plans. Discuss in detail what will happen after school. Will your child come home on the bus, be picked up or go to childcare? If there is a different routine each day, make sure it is clear. Put up a calendar with different after-school plans highlighted in different colors--childcare days marked in red, and bus days marked in green, for example. Remind your child to check the calendar every morning before leaving for school.
Begin practicing your morning routine a few weeks in advance. Because many children sleep in during summer vacation, getting up for the first day of school can be quite a rude awakening. Buy your child an alarm clock and start waking him up a half hour earlier every week until you get to school wakeup time. On the first day of school, get up 15 minutes early so your child can take his time dressing, eating and walking to the bus stop.
Visit the school. Many schools have open houses a week or so before school starts. However, even if the school doesn't sponsor an official event, you can take a tour on your own. Go to school and help your child find out where his classroom is, and how to get to the bathroom, cafeteria, library and bus. Let him play in the schoolyard. If possible, introduce your child to the principal, the teacher and some other children who will be in the class. Perhaps you can hold a pre-school party so future classmates can get acquainted.
Shop early for your child's back-to-school wardrobe. If possible take only one child at a time and make this a special occasion. Before setting out for the stores, look through his or her closets and make a list of what's needed. (This is a great time to clean out those closets!) Set a budget and discuss possible shopping alternatives beforehand. Point out that shopping a full-price, high-end department store will net fewer items than shopping sales or at discount stores and/or resale shops. Let your child pick out a special outfit for the first day of school, but avoid making appearance an additional stress factor.
Purchase school supplies. Your child's teacher will probably provide a list of essential school supplies, but there are some basics to buy before the stores are picked over: notebook paper, pens, pencils, etc. Let your child pick out supplies that will help her be excited about school. Label them with your child's name or a special mark.
Devise a homework routine. Save yourself and your child headaches by discussing beforehand how and when homework will be done. Help your child establish a routine, a time (right after school, before going out to play or after dinner) and a spot for homework. Some children study better alone at a desk in the bedroom, while others accomplish more working at the kitchen table.
Stage a dress rehearsal. The day before school starts, have a dress rehearsal with your child. Get up early, dress and eat a nutritious breakfast. Walk to the bus stop or drive your child to school. In the afternoon, remind your child of the approximate time he will be coming home. Discuss his after-school routine and homework routine.
Be reassuring. If, after all this preparation, your child is still fearful about school, let him know that it's OK to be afraid. But, try to emphasize the positive--what he will learn and the new friends he will make.

Author Peggy Middendorf is editor of Atlanta Parent Magazine.